Especially when they give me more detailed information about just how incredibly stupid Amazons Attack is. In this case, Tim Ellrod was kind enough to let me post this e-mail explaining just how remarkably idiotic not only the Amazons catching up to Air Force one was, but also the bomb that malfunctioned:

I have to say that when you said that the worst was yet to come, I didn’t really know what you meant, and I’d pretty much thought that it would just be more of the same.

I was wrong.

While the physics and science in the first two issues was annoying, the problems in these two issues…where do I start?

Air Force One has a cruising speed of about 575 miles per hour (this from some very cursory research), so those Pegasi (Pegasuses…?) have got to be on PCP or something. Additionally, that sucker is flying at an altitude of around 30,000 feet above ground, so the Amazons and their Pegas…damn, now I know why you just went with “flying horses”. Anyway, the Amazons and their steeds probably couldn’t even breathe at that height, much less catch up to a plane traveling at 84% of the speed of sound.

This isn’t the worst, though. No, no. The worst has got to be the high-tech bomb at the nuclear power plant, and how Green Arrow says that if it had gone off by the reactor, it would have reduced Star City to a green crater for thousands of years. Bull. Crap. A fission reactor is not a fission bomb. A fission bomb needs highly refined “weapons grade” Uranium, which will have a purity of about 95% U-235. A fission reactor on the other hand, doesn’t need weapons grade stuff, so it’ll generally have about 5% U-235. Sticking a friggin’ hand grenade next to a fission reactor will not cause it to become an A-Bomb!

On a side note, the comic makes this big thing of the Bana using high-tech weapons, while the Amazons do not. Are they even supposed to be super-advanced like that? From the brief summary you gave, it just seemed like they were a slightly different group of Amazons.

Oh, and as it happens, Batman’s bee line gave me the distinct impresion that he’s not apathetic, but that he knows how ridiculous things have gotten. “Bees. My God.” sounded a lot like “Bees. *shakes head* You’ve got to be #@%&ing kidding me.” I’m not joking; that’s really what it looked like when I read it.

Also…

Not-Bush: “A relic of the Cold War. Allows arrest of suspicious individuals. Provides for deportation. Imprisonment. Camps. …the people need to know they’re safe. Secure. They need to know that someone strong and capable is looking out for them. Implement the order. Now. There’s no other way to save the country.”

Are we sure this comic wasn’t co-written by Michael Moore?

Besides, all this boldface type is reminding me of another, much funnier comic, a comic about Gotham City, and it’s filthy crime-ridden streets crawling with corrupt cops and whores. Crawling with them.

I enjoyed that comic so much more than this one…

Not-Bush’s plan is made even stupider when you realize that it doesn’t even fit into the comic. The writers are literally bending the story just to wedge this anti-Bush “subtext” into it. If a group of armored warriors arrived in D.C., the most logical course of action is to attack them. How on Earth is arresting “suspicious individuals” going to help? Besides, it should be pretty clear when someone is an Amazon, what with all the armor and sharp weapons. You shouldn’t get that many unjust arrests on this one.

Finally, on the poll, while Supergirl and Wonder Girl are acting like idiots, the dumbest plot I have yet seen is still the Church of Humanity’s plan. Basically each step of that plan was stupid, from Nightcrawler going right from “low-ranking priest” to pope, to the “false rapture” element.

Sincerely,
-Dick Grayson, age twe-…erm…Tim.

Oh dear lord do I love my fans. ^^

[ssba]

Back Issues!

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  • RANDOM?!

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